[Video]

[la_belle_rogue]

[Rogue doesn't look happen when she turns on the feed. In fact, she seems grim and pensive. She's sitting at the island in her kitchen, arms folded across the counter top, leaning over them heavily. She takes a moment to gather her thoughts before she starts speaking.]

Ah wanna talk about choices for a minute. This place is very unique, in that it offers up an option that should be the hard choice, and makes it look like the easy choice.

Killin' someone should never be considered the right thing to do. Sometimes it's the necessary thing. Sometimes it's the only thing we can do, when faced with an extreme situation. Life or death. Kill or be killed. But the Barge warps that into an easy go to and it shouldn't be. Not every option is life or death, kill or be killed.

Sometimes we find ourselves between rocks and hard places. And in those times our choices are either bad or worse. But just because a choice might not be a good one, doesn't mean that it's not the better one. Just because a choice leaves a mess behind, doesn't mean it's not better than the alternative.

Now before ya'll start in on how death isn't permanent here, let me just say this: Ah. Don't. Care. Wardens are here ta help people get their lives back, and actin' cavalier 'bout takin' someone's life is pretty counter productive ta that, from where Ah'm standin'.

We've got a lot of extraordinary people here, who can do amazin' things, but we have become frighteningly dependent on one lone miracle. We're treatin' death like a time out. Death should be the hardest choice we make, no matter what world we're from, no matter how many reset buttons the Admiral is willin' ta press for us. It never should be treated lightly. Even in a place where it doesn't stick. And we certainly shouldn't get angry at someone when they choose not ta take a life, no matter what mess comes with that choice. Don't ya see how backwards this is? And we've been doin' it for a long time here. Ah imagine a lot longer than Ah've been around, and Ah can honestly say Ah'm ashamed for not payin' attention t'it sooner and speakin' up about it before now.

[She shakes her head, sits back. What else can she say on this?]

That's all Ah've got ta say.

Comments

[godsays]

So it was your understanding that had you rip his chest open, slice out his heart and leave him in the black, undying.

At least I know what I am! I'm broken, and I'll never be fixed. But, you, you were the one who kept me broken because you could, and it was convenient, and because broken things will always be yours. If you'd loved me, you wouldn't have -

[ And here he stops, suddenly. Breathes in a shaky breath, his jaw slack. As always, there is an element of selfishness in any of this. You took away what was mine. You took away what I loved. You took away love... ]

At least I know what I am. I'm broken. I'll never be fixed.

You're disgusting.

[youwill]

[There is the proof he was looking for.]

I am not your father, nor am I the man from Oxford. [He will admit, to himself if no other, that it was not a terribly great difference. Save for a few key moments.]

I do not love you. I do not care for your misinterpretations of my character, though now I do understand it. How can you not, if you have no faith in yourself?

[godsays]

Don't tell me you're nothing like that man.

[youwill]

Don't take out your self-doubt on me.

[godsays]

I have scars.

You're a monster.

[youwill]

You are not the only one with scars!

[His voices raises; he gives the impression of yelling without shouting. The politest emphasis.]

[godsays]

Do you control them, or do they control you?

[youwill]

Which do you think?

[godsays]

I think one makes you bad. And the other makes you worse.

[youwill]

What do you control, Zane?

[godsays]

Nothing but myself.

[youwill]

Then at least you know what you are.

[He doesn't say, a monster. But the words hover in the air between them.]

[godsays]

[ He cuts that word off. He believes he is hurt, and that he will never be pure. It doesn't mean he believes he's a monster. ]

Loving.

[ He is loving. ]

[youwill]

As you say.

[The fight doesn't go out of him - he was calm enough through out. His tone says he isn't agreeing, though.]

[godsays]

I am mine.